The Orange

I thought the title was a little bit far fetched until I realised just how clever I am (I must remind my wife some time).

Don’t Believe the Hype was one of Public Enemy’s finest … and it’s our favourite sons – the All Blacks – who are public enemy number 1 in the UK right now.

If you believe the NZ papers, it’s all about the Pommy press picking on our boy, Tana.

Yet, not all the articles are anti-AB or anti All Black.

Eddie Buttler, writing in the Guardian, finishes an article on three diaries that have been published since the Tour (including the famous Life of Brian diary) with the following:

And that is why, long after it should have been forgotten, the failed tour of 2005 is with us still, even as the All Blacks arrive for their grand-slam tour and try to move things on.

Mind you, in the same edition, another writer states that New Zealand’s stubborn refusal to apologise for the spear tackle that nearly ended Brian O’Driscoll’s career will only lead to further bad blood.

I suppose that one thing is certain – the journos fascination with the whole thing is a sure way of selling newspapers until there’s actually some rugby to write about.

Postscript

It’s official – the Poms are over it. It was never Tana’s fault altho – yes – he should have been penalised, yellow carded and or suspended. At least there are quality journalists writing sense.

Any opportunity to stuff it down the Aussies’ throat should be accepted and milked to the stage of boredom.

The Silver Ferns’ flogging of the Aussies is a perfect example.

The largest winning victory every of the greatest enemy.

A repeat of the earlier Thriller Nowhere Near Manila … the so called boxing match.

An embarassing win against the old enemy.

Yet the lead story in the sports pages of the Sunday Start Times was a castle with a couple of All Blacks in front of it.

I’m not suggesting at all we go all PC and replace genuine sports stories with patronising stories on female sports for no reason than they are played by females.

Far from it. All Kiwi sports fan will be celebrating the Silver Ferns’ win and the extent to which the Aussies’ noses are now covered in a brown substance.

I just feel that the SST missed a perfect opportunity to lead with the top sports story – regardless of the gender of the players.

And, as Muzza Deaker pointed out, it would certainly have made for better pictures on the first page of the Sports section!

More on the Michael Walker saga to give it a more a more dignified name than it deserves.

The Granny Herald did a surprisingly perseptive and balance feature on Michael.

As the story notes:

Walker can’t believe the fuss it has caused in an industry battling a seemingly inexorable decline in all the important yardsticks: participation, on-course attendances, share of the gambling dollar, and stake money.

Quite frankly, I found the fact that it became an issue bizzare and the reaction from some in the racing community quite scary. It won’t surprise that the original post can’t even spell Maori correctly.

It brings to mind thoughts of the band and the Titanic – as racing sails towards bigger and bigger icebergs, some people believe that the industry’s ills can be solved by MW not poking his tongue.

It’s not what I call Xcellent!

Justin Marshall has always been a great player, but now I see he’s turning hand to coaching.

Funny, but he always seemed more likely to be a referee once he’d hung up his playing boots!

OK, a desperate title but you’ve got to hand it to the White Sox for following in Boston’s footsteps (obviously not bare footed) and winning the Major League.

Mind you, given that the last time the Sox won was the year after Boston last won before the curse of the Bambino – do-do-do-do – then perhaps all we need to do to find out the next World Series winner is to find out who won after Boston and Chicago 80 odd years ago.

And if you think that’s stupid, try understanding ERA – the Earned Run Average statistic.

In short, it’s a stat that indicates how many runs are scored off a pitcher over 9 innings but NOT including runs and bases scored from errors. Go figure.

It makes understand Martin Crowe’s batting record easy … although understanding how his hair can grow back is still a little bit more mystifying.

It happens every year so it’s a bit of a surprise that it’s … err … a suprise.

Lesley the Volcano Vainokolo walks all of the Poms in the Superleague. His club decides that Lesley needs an urgent operation … the same day that he’s supposed to be joining the Kiwis.

The club coach happens to be the Great Britain coach. Poor Brian igNoble gets upset that people are calling him names.

Quite seriously, the Kiwis should tell the Poms and Ockers to stick it.

The Aussies get a nice break between their two opening rounds and their first game versus the Poms. Not the Kiwis.

The Pommy and Aussie clubs tell their Kiwi players to take the off-season off. I don’t see the Warriors telling Steve Price to go surfing.

The Aussie team doctor gets to make the final call on whether the players tour or not. The Aussie NRL teams may as well select the Kiwis.

It’s not a level playing field and never has been. I just hope the Kiwis can stick it up them in this year’s Tri Series then tell them to stick next year’s up their jumpers.

We all know that racing is facing a few problems.

Actually, the problems have to be life-threatening if the answer is Winston Peters.

I’ve also commented on the ridiculously small fields racing at Trentham last week – 3 horses competing for $30K.

Given all the big issues in racing, I had little choice to laugh when I read that the racing officials are spending time and effort reprimanding Michael Walker for doing a pukana (poking his tongue) when he crosses the finish line ahead of the rest.

Given that HMS Racing seems to have been built by the same lot that built the Titanic, you would think they would have more important things on their mind.

They might even consider that it adds a bit of flavour and cultural diversity. Anything to get people to racing and following the personalities.

Instead, racing spends more time on the ludicrous at the expense of the important.

What next – the stipes “talking” to Walker when he gives his three finger “W” salute … after all, three fingers is the V fingers together with the bird!

The AB’s brains trust is quite adamant – it’s not the Grand Slam tour.

It just happens, that if they win all four games it will be a grand slam. As they say, if it looks like a duck and sounds like a duck it must be … let’s duck that one!

So if it’s not a Grand Slam tour, then what is it?

Quite clearly, it’s another step towards the WC in 2007 and you have to give the selectors credit for being brave. And if they’re not being brave, then it certainly won’t be a grand tour.

The full team is listed here.

You would expect that some of the players will be demanding that the jerseys have the names of the players on them along with their number … that way, there’s a chance they’ll recognise Isaia Toneava and will be able to call our his name!

Marty Holah draws a tough one altho you can see the logic with taking Chris Masoe.

Leaving behind Marty Holah shows the selectors are genuining serious about checking out players with a view to 2007 rather than focussing on winning the Grand Slam.

Not that it is a grand slam.

Footnote:
My apology for both my readers for not keeping up to date – still feeling like a bus has departed from somewhere on top of me.

So the NPC as we know it will be know more.

Fittingly, the winners of Division 1 and Division 2 deserved their wins.

Auckland has dominated the NPC, winning 15 of the 30 titles on offer. It was very much the case when Auckland was strong, the AB’s were strong.

More to the point, the success of this year’s Jafas has shown the blue print (that’s quite a good one if you think about it!) for attacking “total rugby”.

We saw it earlier in the year when the more expansive game of the All Blacks easily over came the Lions … or was that the Pussies?

As for Division 2, it was great to see the Magpies fly again. As an old time Bay boy, the legacy of the Magpies – particularly in the Ranfurly Shield – is easily forgotten.

However, it’s not as easy to forget players of the ilk of Tremain, Nepia, and the Brownlee brothers.

The Bay has also been the breeding ground for a host of more recent players who have left the region to play at the highest level, notably Norm “Twinketoes” Hewitt, Taine Randell and the Cooper bros to name a matching set of All Blacks.

The new NPC gives Hawkes Bay the chance to turn the clock back.

I thought match races were something you saw in the movies, like Seabiscuit.

Until I saw a three horse race at Trentham today.

This may not make much sense to some, but races with less than 8 (especially on the flat) cause consternation at the least and mean that place dividends are paid out on only 2 runners.

But with only 3 runners, there was only a win pool.

Still, I’m quite sure that if you’re reading this it doesn’t really rate as news.

The race wasn’t the Ekathuna Maiden for $3000. Far from it – the race was at Trentham and the horses were competing for a stake of $30000 – and that’s NOT a typo.

So for just turning up, the horse that ran third got $3000.

I can’t work out whether it shows how bad the problems are at Trentham or the with racing as an industry. Both are valid answers.

Either way, it shows that three’s definitely not company in racing.