The Orange

The first cricket test started yesterday in Dunedin.

Yep, a test match in Dunedin in November.  Suppose we should look on the positive side … at least it didn’t snow.

The test raised a couple of interesting points related to the toss.

For a start, the game is technically a home game for the Pakis so Daniel Vettori as the “visiting” captain called the coin toss.  Strange that.

Which of course raises a completely separate issue about the importance of the toss and “home” advantage.

Listening to Mark on Radio Sport, he argued that the home team should get to call the shots – no toss, just choose.

I think he’s half right.  In many cases, there’s too much attached to the toss that there needs to be a real incentive to make sure teams don’t doctor the pitch.

By giving the AWAY team the right to choose, any attempt to doctor a pitch is almost certain to fail.

In baseball the visiting team always bats first, according to Wikipedia.

An inning is broken up into two halves in which the away team bats in the top (first) half, and the home team bats in the bottom (second) half. In baseball, the defense always has the ball — a fact that differentiates it from most other team sports.

(I left the last sentence in only because I’m a trainspotter – still an interesting point!)

Anyway, that’s sorted.  Let’s get rid of the toss and give the away team the choice.

Now that’s choice!

Bastards!

There’s usually not a lot of gain in other people’s pain.

OK, let’s be real we laugh at other’s misfortune so long as no one is judging us so feel free to enjoy a collection of cricket injuries.

And yes, it DOES feature the inimitable Mark “Rigor” Richardson going down with cramp like he’d been short with a 303.

Sam’s #1 sporting moment:

Typical.

I have a great headline but nothing much to say about it that hasn’t been written already.

If you want to read what the Granny Herald had to say, check out the story here.

Let’s just hope the magic ride lasts one more game.

At least we won’t be up against those cheating Aussie umpires!

In case you missed all the excitement (and assuming YouTube don’t pull the vid!):

First, let’s be clear – the best way to make the Black Caps perform is to injure them or deprive them of a couple of key players.

The Hurricanes use to claim that you should expect the unexpected but even that doesn’t go close to describing the experience of supporting the Black Caps.

Admittedly, it’s only two games in a row but still the games that have been one were both must win games and as I’ve noted already required some character that has been sadly missing in recent years.

And it hasn’t been lost on the world’s press either.

The SMH was impressed:

Brave New Zealand shrugged off an injury crisis to defeat England by four wickets at the Wanderers overnight and join them in the Champions Trophy semi-finals.

So too were the Poms who it must be admitted have to put up with an equally inconsistent team.

The Telegraph however notes that the Poms have a bad record against the Black Craps:

But it also continues [England's] strangely awful record against New Zealand, whom they have beaten only four times in the last 18 attempts.

Ready yourself for the backhanded compliment:

It is almost as if England can get themselves up for the big teams – the Indians or the South Africans – and yet still tend to underestimate the resilient and resourceful Kiwis. The adrenaline does not start pumping when Grant Elliott, a typical New Zealand trundler, begins his shuffling approach to the crease. And yet on a pitch like this one – which was as cracked as a castaway’s lips – a gentle medium-pacer can be just as dangerous as the nastiest fastie in town.

The Times saw this as more of a Pommy failure but frankly, who cares?

Even at 2,000 metres above sea level it is possible to crash down to earth. England did just that yesterday, and will now face the winners of today’s match between Australia and Pakistan in the semi-final at Centurion on Friday having missed the chance to finish top of group B.

While all three mentioned The Run Out That Wasn’t, only the Guardian kicked off with a reference to it:

The Champions Trophy might not be the biggest tournament in the world, but it certainly does a roaring trade in moral dilemmas. England have played three times and on each occasion captains have spent half the night agonising over ‘The Spirit of Cricket’. At this rate, umpires raising fingers will soon be replaced by priests administering blessings.

While Vettori rightfully gets the plaudits, McCullum gets a bit of borax:

The striking fact here is that McCullum has made a habit of such practice, and with New Zealand’s approval. In a Christchurch Test three years ago, with the ball still ‘live’, he threw down the stumps to run out Muttiah Muralitharan, who had walked out of his crease to congratulate Kumar Sangakkara upon making a century. A year earlier, in Bulawayo, McCullum ran out Chris Mpofu when he walked down the pitch to congratulate Blessing Mahwire upon his maiden Test fifty.

And we complain about the underarm?

Hardly any positive comments about the Black Craps … but this is the English papers and they love nothing more than an England failure.

Glad to be of assistance!

Now I’m not trying to make a real fuss of this, but I feel obligated to bring to you dear reader, yes both of us, the latest sports science date.

But it’s all good news … bonking is good for sports.

According to the latest reports, sex improves performance even cricketers.

Gary Kirsten, a South African who coaches the team, and mental conditioning expert Paddy Upton reportedly told the players that sex before a match increases athletic performance.

“Having sex increases testosterone levels, which causes an increase in strength, aggression and competitiveness,” Kirsten and Upton advised in a document distributed to the players, according to The Hindustan Times.

Which of course explains why Grant Elliot is returning to his roots.

Clearly, the Black Craps top order need a lot of time in the nets.  Or in this case, on the net.

Try Little Master Cricket Game.

Strangely addictive.

You get the feeling Mark Richardson wasn’t used to model the gameplay but he certainly could have benefited from it.

Dan Vettori is the latest cricketer to join the exclusive triple triple club – 3000 runs and three hundred wickets.

The full list is:

Daniel Vettori (New Zealand): 300 wickets at 33.52; 3329 runs at 28.69; 94 tests 1997 – current

Richard Hadlee (NZ): 431 wickets at 22.59; 3124 runs at 27.16; 86 tests 1973-1990

Ian Botham (England): 383 wickets at 28.40; 5200 runs at 33.54, 102 tests 1977-92

Kapil Dev (India): 434 wickets at 29.64; 5248 runs at 31.05; 131 tests 1978-94

Imran Khan (Pakistan): 362 wickets at 22.81; 3807 runs at 37.69; 88 tests 1971-92

Shane Warne (Australia): 708 wickets at 25.41; 3154 runs at 17.32; 145 tests 1992-2007

Shaun Pollock (South Africa): 421 wickets at 23.11; 3781 runs at 32.31; 108 tests 1995-2008

Chaminda Vaas (Sri Lanka): 315 wickets at 29.58; 3089 runs at 24.32; 111 tests 1994-2009

The odd thing being a NZ cricketer supporter is seeing two Kiwis on a top list.  No other country has two.

Now, there’s a danger here we could get a tad excited having a couple of our boys on the top list for anything.

And in fairness, Dan’s had a few things to deal with.

Green top pitches, not much in the way of support from the other end, cheating Aussies umpires, and the biggie – never getting the easy wicket playing against NZ.

Still, it’s not a bad effort particularly given he’s grown up in the on Sky Sport 1, 2 , and 3.

What’s particularly impressive is that he started as bowler with no expectation he could hold a bat.

Not any more:

After struggling to make an impact with the bat early in his career Vettori is now a genuine allrounder having scored three hundreds and 20 half centuries.

Vettori has amassed 3329 runs at 28.69 and despite typically batting at No 8 he has proved New Zealand’s most reliable batsman — this year alone he averages 54.83.

“Five or six years ago I was pretty embarrassed by my test batting record,” said Vettori, who topped New Zealand’s first test batting aggregates with 109.

Yep, I’d be embarassed about playing cricket for NZ when I was 18!

On ya Dan!